The air is green The grass is blue I'm bot stoned.. I'm just high

Roses are red Violets are blue, I am sorry... But you have terminal cancer and are probably going to die in about 3 months

Why couldn't the girl climb out of the pool? She drowned

How does a person put an elephant in a closet? First they have to open the door, then put the elephant in and close the door. That was easy well how does a person put a giraffe in. You probably said open the door and put the giraffe in and close the door. Well you missed a step first you have to take the elephant out then you can put in the giraffe. Well both animals are to big to fit in a closet so you can't put them in and also the person who put the animals in is schizophrenic and the animals are fake so if you believed that you could fit them in there you might be delusional.

Two twins are born only a minute apart. There is a mistake at the hospital and they are seperated. Years later they reconnect on Oprah and realize they do not have much in common.

What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

If you posten bout Kony I feel bad for you son. Cause ive snached 99 children and you pst saved none jesse

What's bigger then a bowling ball? What? Your mom!

What do you call it when the sh*t hits the fan? The sh*t hits the fan.

PSN IS UP

Where did Little Billy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

A straight guy, a straight girl and a bisexual guy walk into a bar. The bisexual guy is twice as likely to find a partner from a purely statistical point of view.

whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

What did the girl get with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

Why did suzie fall off the swing? Because She had no arms. Why did suzie fall off again? Becauze Jimmy was trying to snipe her in the head the first time

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

Ask me if I'm a dinosaur. Are you dinosaur? No.

Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

A black guy and a mexican guy are in a car, Who's driving. A policeman.

why did the black boy start crying when he was taking a dump? He thought he was melting

Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are yellow Azeleas are pinkish purple

What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jam is slightly more viscous and may contain bits of fruit.

A pig and an elephant walk into a bar. But the pig doesn't even make it into the bar because the mentaly insane elephant ate him. Ouch

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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