knock knock who's there? a dog ......dogs cant talk ..................

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How long can penguins hold their breath underwater? Long enough for you to eat a baby and then cover for it.

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We have come to the United States in search of a just, and profitable land, but we have found a place of bigots and racists.

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roses are red violets are blue i have a big dick unlike you

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What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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what starts with P and ends with u-b-e-s? Paul, can you brang me some priangles and the rest of my Rubik's cubes?

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How do you teach another person's son to ride a bike? You don't. Let his real parents teach him to ride a bike.

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Ask Me If I'm A Piece of Bread Are You a Piec--- Nope

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Why couldn't Sally ride a bike? She was disabled

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What did the skeleton say when he was horny? Nothing. Skeletons are not living and therefore cannot be horny.

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Q: If you are running a race and a fridge hits you, how many dogs play x-box in the snow? A: 12 orange waffles

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding half of regis philbin in your apple...

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A fifteen-year-old walks into a bar. He is told to leave by the tender because of his obvious prepubescent appearance, deeming him far from the legal age of drinking.

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how big is the moon? why the hell are you asking me?...dumbass.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a sloth? Everything. The blonde is a human being and humans are way different than sloths.

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Josh Moran sticks polish sausage up his ear and moves it back and forth while squeezing his balls until they rupture.

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An Asian man, a black man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They all buy the same drink, are charged the same price and say " We are all equal! " They then continue on with their days normaly.

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If there are 2 narwhals and two apples, why is each of the narwhals happy? Because each is a narwhal.

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Why was Sally rolling in the grass? She was on fire.

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A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

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Why did the man buy fruits at the store? Because they were available, on sale, and the man was hungry, so he wanted to eat fruit at that time, he then got into his car, but thought to himself first, "I should unlock my car so I can open the door," so he does so, and sits in the drivers seat eating his fruit, he drives off to his home, arrives safely, and greets his family as he enters the house, then they sit down, eat dinner, and go to sleep, the next day, the man goes to the store, and buys vegetables

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Hillary Clinton

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whats worse then girls playing sport ? girls cutting grass

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A: What happened to the snake? B: It died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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