No, we are all different, none of us are the same, you however, have no match, your ability to think influence and inspire even today, is unmatched. It is he who is unmatched, who stands alone.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure but my guess is that there was some logical reasoning behind the action.

Two cowboys are in a kitchen. The first one says, "I feel at Home on the range!" To which the second replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he has never pursued his real dream.

Q: Why did the lady retire? A: Because she had been working for numerous years and felt that she needed to spend more time with her family.

Your mom is so stupid, she thought the square root of pie was 3.14156

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i got 5 Fingers, the middle ones for you ?

How do you get a Jew into a car? Tell him to get in the car.

Knock, knock Who's there? Man Man who? The man who is knocking. Now open the door Carl!

What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? - "Get down"

If the red house is made out of red bricks, the yellow house is made out of yellow bricks, and the blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is the greenhouse made of? Ah, I see what you did there. You are expecting me to follow the sequence based on how each house is made out of bricks the same color as their title. However, I am one step ahead of you and I know that the greenhouse is made out of glass panels. But what if it were made out of green glass panels? Then, I suppose, the sequence could continue naturally yet we still have a problem of units - bricks vs. glass. Quite the dilemma we are facing.

Yo mama is so poor I saw her kicking a can down the street and asked her what she was doing? Her reply was: Kicking a can down the street. What did you think she was doing? Moving?

Whats small, red and white, and would kill you if shot out of a cannon? A decapitated baby

who's that hot blonde at the disco? your mother.

Justin's humor

Why can't Helen Keller conduct a Train. Because she is dead.

kieran scott has a huge back

why did the black boy read a book. Because he had a book report due next week

What's the best way to get gum out of your hair? Cancer

One day a man was out fishing in the lake. Suddenly, there was a huge fish pulling his fishing pole so hard it almost broke. Luckily, he managed to pull the fish into his boat. It was the biggest fish he had ever caught and he brought it home for his family to see. They were all very proud.

Why was the little boy upset? He was on fire.

Knock, knock. Who's there? I. I who? I broke my dick.

What did the college student say after he failed his test? He didn't say anything, he was a mute.

What starts with F and ends with Uck? F U C K

A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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