Q: What is better than sex? A: A relationship where you can be completely intimate with your partner

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What happens when you divide by zero? According to the limits in Calculus, 1/x as x approaches 0 becomes closer to infinity, so we can safely conclude that if we could divide by zero, it would be a form of infinity. Positive infinity for 1/0, negative infinity for -1/0 and unsigned infinity for 0/0, as zero has no sign.

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Bob: Hey Jim, what's up? Jim: Obviously the sky, oh and i see a few planes too. by the way why are you asking me why don't you just look up?

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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Where do you find a dog? At a pet store.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Llama. Llama who? Llamas aren't racist unlike that bastard Ann Coulter. That's why they can get a carrot up the ass and she can't.

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What's worse than a dead baby falling out of a tree? Two dead babies stapled together falling out of a tree.

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A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman walk into a bar and the barman asks "Is this some kind of a joke?"

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Why did little Johnny fall off his swing? He had no arms.

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We live in a world.... Yeah its called Earth.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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How long does it take a black woman to have a baby? Nine months, give or take a few days depending on whether she goes into labour early or not.

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What do you call it when a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Vicar meet for a drink at the bar? A social gathering.

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Are you from Tenessee? I heard you were from there

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Why was Little Billy crying? He had an axe embedded in his chest.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interupting doc- You have aids.

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willie revilame

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't make sense. Refrigerator.

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I leave you with a riddle, I am round. I am an orange. What am I?

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Before Super Mario existed what did people play? Instruments.

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Why has the suicide in dentists decreased? -Due to the fact that being a dentist makes suicide redundant!

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What did the bowl of cereal say? Can I have some milk?

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How would you punish Helen Keller? Make her read a basketball.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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