Why was the human stronger than the dog? Because the dog had four legs and a mouth and a human has 2 legs, 2 arms, and is taller. Therefore, the human has more capabilites than the dog.

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A man scratches his ankle and says " my nuts are itchy" a woman looks at him questionly. realizing he had been watched, he lifted the bottom of his pant leg and showed to woman that he had stuffed his socks with pecans.

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A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office covered only in Saran Wrap. He asks the doctor, "The strip of metal teeth is missing from the box, so could I borrow your scissors?"

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What do you call a person with no arms or legs rolling around in leaves? I don't know that seems like a highly improbable situation

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. The man apologizes, and the bra assures him not to worry. They both continue on their way. The man wonders what a bra is doing walking around unattached to a woman, especially this late at night.

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An Irishman, an Englishman and a Scott land on an island. They were on vacation and returned to the UK, which consists of two isles.

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Women's rights

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A black man, a Asian, and a Jew fell into a pit and because of a lack of water they all died.

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What's worse than losing one of your socks? Being jewish during the holocaust

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Latvian guy said to the other latvian guy: ''Why did the chicken cross the road?'' The other latvian guy responded: ''In truth, i do not know. I have not seen chicken in 10 years. The last time was before the red army plundered my village. I can still hear all the screams from the women being raped. But, back to question. Where is this chicken you speak of? I have not eaten in days and my wife and children are close to starvation aswell''

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Why did the black man cross the road? To show the chicken that it isn't that hard.

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Roses are red Violets are blue One fish two fish Red fish blue fish

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if a joke has not punch line, how does that strike you?

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How does Batman's mom call him home for supper? Nothing. Batman's mom is dead.

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Why was Chris crying? There was a robbery at his house and both of his parents were brutally murdered.

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Why did the fat chick have a camel toe? She was half camel

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Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

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Two blondes get in a taxi. Who's driving? The taxi driver.

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What's something that really sucks? Having a homicidal cat on your chest.

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Why did the buetiful woman marry the homeless man? True love

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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Why did the black 10 year old miss school? Because his grandmother just had a severe heart attack and the whole family is coming in to visit and pay their last respects.

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whats worse than getting ur penis cut off......no holocaust

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One day a mans computer was unusually, when all else failed, he had to go to extreme measures. He then refreshed his page.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops