Two women are sitting next to each other in a bar minding their own business.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

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Q: What did the chicken cross the road? A: "Why did the chicken cross the road?" is a common riddle or joke in several languages. The answer or punchline is: "To get to the other side." The riddle is an example of anti-humor, in that the curious setup of the joke leads the listener to expect a traditional punchline, but they are instead given a simple statement of fact. "Why did the chicken cross the road?" has become largely iconic as an exemplary generic joke to which most people know the answer, and has been repeated and changed numerous times.

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What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

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Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

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Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave.

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What is stupid? I would say you but these jokes are worse.

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balls

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"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the gorcery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons."

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I like my wine just like how I like my woman 5 years old and in my basement.

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What was Billy for Halloween? A pirate

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Do you want to hear a joke?!?!?!?!?!?! A happy orphan

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what the difference between matthew and a retard? The retard can do math

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If you like piña coladas! You might be an alcoholic

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When life gives you oranges, hit kidswith 'em.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is legally blind.

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A 2 lb ball and a 10 lb ball are dropped at the same time. Which hits the ground first? They both hit the ground first. Go ahead and try it. Go on. Now. If you are still reading you really want to know if anything else is going to happen. Well nothing exciting. Just a potato. 0 looks like a potato

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In the weeks following the original release of Die Hard, reports sprung up across the nation of impressionable boys overdosing while masturbating.

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what does the homeless man do when he gets home? nothing, he's homeless

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You're momma's so fat..Oh wait she's not.

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Why did the chicken crossed yo mama? Because your moms a man and your birth certificate was an apology letter from the condom factory.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? Dr. Jeremy Brown, I have your results from the blood test. It's good news they came back negative. Hooray.

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~Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was dead. ~ ~Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was stapled to the monkey!!!

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Why did the cow jump over the moon ? This is a highly unlikely situation , therefore the cow did not leave its humble pasture , let alone talk english while in the midst of jumping over a planet wich takes days to fly over .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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