Yeah, I mean to be honest with you, I get that one a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a man without any money? Broke.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

how do you kill Lady Gaga? with a gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do u stop sky from being gay. You don't

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did Helen Keller say to Michael Jordon before she died? Nothing...

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Yo momma so fat,she went on a diet and now exersizes regularly

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Your mother is so fat that people make rude comments about her behind her back, but they shouldn't because she's a really nice lady.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

My grandpa asked me a very important question right before he kicked the bucket. Grandpa: Son, how far do you think I could kick this bucket?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when the elephants were coming? Here come the elephants! What did Jane say when the elephants were coming? Here come the plums! (She was color blind.)

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I remember in the 80's it felt like Bill Cosby was being shoved down my throat. He was always on TV with his show and those Jello commercials.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do bicycles and platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A dyslexic paraplegic walks into a bra

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Wanna know how to confuse a blonde? No. I wanna know which way you would prefer to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Starving children in africa.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Two giraffes walk into a bar, hit their heads, cracktheir skulls and die.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

When I grow up, I don't want to be a therapist. I have enough trouble figuring out the problems in my math book.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what did sandy say to mr krabs nothing squirles are not smart enough to make a air tank and go under water

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What starts with P and ends with ORN? POPCORN

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the man's motorcycle not move when the street light turned green? Because it was a filing cabinet.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Your mom.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Little Johnny was always bullied at school. Everyday he would get picked on by the same kid, Todd. Todd was a red-headed bully with no discipline. Johnny one day went home and started crying. His father asked the little boy, "Jonny why are you crying?" John replied, "I keep getting bullied". His father stood up and told him, "You must become a big man and step up to him and tell him how you feel. It will surprise him and he will then back off. It always works." Johnny then felt inspired. Later that night he started practicing what he will say in the mirror. By the next morning he felt like he was ready. Johnny was confident about himself for once. He walked up to Todd and told him, "I'm tired of your bullying and next time you will regret it!!". Todd looked surprised and had his jaw opened. Todd then said, "I'm sorry Johnny I didn't know you felt that way." Johnny looked confused. "Here come with me and I'll buy us ice cream". When they went to go get ice cream, Todd brutally stabbed Johnny until he was losing blood and repeatedly raped his dead body.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How long is a china man?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops