Knock knock! Who's there? A bottle of beer. No thanks, I've been sober for 15 years.

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What's worse than dying? Dying twice.

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What do you call it when a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Vicar meet for a drink at the bar? A social gathering.

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my captcha says : forkin chickens

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<3 ... it looks more like scissors than a heart...

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there is a mexican and a black guy in the back of a car, who is driving? The cop

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Q: what did the dad get for playing baseball with his son? A: a line drive to his balls

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What ticks and makes a very loud noise? the bed

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What did the black man say to the young white woman during sex? you are a wonderful woman

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How do you give an 80 year old man a heart attack? Hold a gun to his head

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holocaust is bad but its funny when you use it as a joke hehe

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The third one is for you

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An Asian man and an Irish man are standing at the bus stop, chatting casually, while waiting for the bus to arrive. The Irish man then turns to the Asian and says, "Despite our blatant differences in both race and culture, perhaps someday when we are both available, we can meet and talk civilly about our everyday lives over a cup of coffee."

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.

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What's brown and sticky? Turtle excrement.

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A chicken walks into a barn.

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FUCK THE JEWS

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A plane is going to land at 3:30, if the monkey is holding a gun how does the bus driver commite suicide 12, because the laywer attacked the dyslexic man.

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"I like my women like I like my coffee, in a cup." -Paul Alangadan

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If life gives you lemons, get some seeds from them and plant them. Then in a few years you'll have a lemon tree. Then take some lemons off that tree and throw them at people saying "Here's your stupid lemons, people".

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Chrismas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long

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Are you from Tennessee? Cause my uncle grew up there and I was wondering if you knew him.

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Anyone??????????/

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Why did the little boy get food poisoning? Because his family can't afford to buy organic food, and can only afford McDonald's burgers, where their cows are forced to stand in their own feces.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops