Who do you call when there is a ghost in your house? You should problably call the doctor, you may be hallucinating.

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Guess what. I eat weed and smoke yogurt

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Two tigers, walking down Oxford St. One turns to the other & says, "Quiet for a Saturday, don't you think?"

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Roses are red my name is dave this poem makes no bloody sense microwave

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EVERYONE TEXT 513-646-2835 AND ASK HIM WHY HE HAS GOOP IN HIS PANTS. his names travis

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What do Tutankhamun and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead

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Why did the baby cross the road? A very uncaring parent left their infant outside. The unsupervised baby then crawled under the fence and began to head towards the road. When the baby began to cross the road, there were two cars coming from both directions. Luckily, they saw the baby and came to an abrupt stop. Unfortunately, when the baby made it to the other side, an eagle swooped down and snatched the baby, because it is a bird of prey. Fortunately, the child's life was spared by the eagle. The Department of Child Services showed up later only to confiscate the baby from the parents. The eagle wanted to adopt it, but it could not speak nor could it sign the legal documents because it was an eagle.

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Women's rights

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Three men walk into a bar. Start drinking, fight each other and sustain massive head injuries.

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Nickleback walks into a bar..... There isn't a punchline because ruining music isn't funny.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Door! He then broke down into tears as the nightmares from his schizophrenia had lead to a severely crippled mental state.

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Why do they give old people Viagra at nursing homes? Because erectile function decreases with increasing age, and it would be unfair to needlessly deny senior citizens the right to consensual intercourse if that is what they want.

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Win industrial estate, Newry

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If Jewish men light a menorah during Hanukkah, what do Jewish women light? Jewish women light a menorah as well; Judaism is a relatively fair religion to both sexes.

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Why is a chicken coupe, a coupe not a sedan? Because a sedan would have four doors.

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Why was the sex offender sweating in the playground? Because he was pushing his over weight son on the swing.

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What's blue, cold and makes people cry? A dead baby

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Trampoline.

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What's funny? A joke. What's funnier than a joke? Two jokes.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman

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-Knock, knock. -Who's there? -The pest control guy. -Please leave me alone I'm giving birth.

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hello anomonous

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whats worst then dieng in a videogame

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Two men walk into a bar. It turns out the bar was a lever and set off a bomb. They both died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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