Why can't Hellen Keller read, write, or do anything really? Because, shes a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the cow jump over the moon ? This is a highly unlikely situation , therefore the cow did not leave its humble pasture , let alone talk english while in the midst of jumping over a planet wich takes days to fly over .

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Not getting a response, the disoriented bartender realizes he was talking to his own reflection in the mirror at the back of the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats better than ten dead babys in one trashcan??? One dead baby in ten trashcans.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than Fantasy Basketball? Playing Fantasy WNBA.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was Helen Keller a terrible driver? She was a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the black guy buy spray paint? To paint his fence, to keep it from rotting away.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Nero, please cut the bull, I know you work for the feds, you are involved with the FBI, I know, but its not my problem, I just do not like you lying to me.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

the old man fell down the stairs and broke his leg, he then went to the hospital and got a cast. later that day he went home and ate soup

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was feeling suicidal due to an existential crisis.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock Knock Go Away

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's spotted and has dildos strapped to their neck? Jews

thumb_up thumb_down +13

knock knock Who's there? Someone who wants to save you from the shitty dinner your lazy wife made.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

If you're having Kony problems, I feel bad for you son. He's stolen 99 kids and your posters saved none.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you drown a blond? By being an insane murderer!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your mumma is so stupid her IQ is 40.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you get when you cross a horse with a house cat ? A law suit for animal cruelty

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Okay, so your school has a fire drill, and a ginger asks why the alarm went off. You reply, “Some new kid saw your hair and pulled the fire alarm

thumb_up thumb_down +11

It's easy to take part, just type your text below! no

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock Knock? Who's there? How did you know it was me?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is worse than standing on a plug? finding out your family have all been killen in a horrible car crash and your neighbours daughter who happens to be your friend has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What's the biggest lie ever? A: Saying you read the Terms of Service

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why did the little girl fall off the swing she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops