A midget walks into a bar. No one cares.

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The teacher hands out tests to the students and some of the students say to the teacher "what does 'no grade' mean?" The teacher responds, "Oh I need to grade them still.")

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Why didn't the gangster cross the road? Because he J-walked and was hit by a car.

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Where did Susie go in the bombing? Nowhere. Susie is the bomber.

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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How did OJ get away with murder? No one really knows. Probably because he an excellent group of lawyers

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A man goes into the doctors office for his yearly checkup. The man waits patiently for several minutes until the doctor is ready to see him. After about ten minutes pass, the doctor is ready to see him. The man enters the doctors office. He passes all of the necessary tests. The doctor and him talk for a while. After a few minutes, the doctor says, "Okay, thanks for coming. See you next year." The man thanks the doctor and leaves.

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How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic men? 25

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What would Walt Disney be if he were still alive today? Still anti-semetic

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Q. why did I get hurt A. My pants fell off

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The only thing worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke is finding a REAL joke on Anti-Joke

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A teacher, a consturction worker, and an army general are on an airplane. The pilot tells them the plane has too much weight, and if they don't each drop one item then the plane will crash. Realizing one item each is obviously not enough weight to throw off, the teacher and the construction worker team up and throw the army genral off the plane. They land safely, and live the rest of their life haunted by their vile actions.

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What did the blind man say to his best friend? All i see is darkness and i want to end my life

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Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? To honor his father, Jonathan "Red" Hoffner, who was tragically killed in the line of duty. While attempting to save 3 small children in a trailer park fire, the elder firefighter suffered 3rd degree burns over 80 percent of his body. "Red" was rushed to a local hospital and lingered for several agonizing days. He began to rally but a careless error by a night nurse led to his unfortunate demise. His son was psychologically unable to wear anything but red suspenders every day for the rest of his life - not only because of his father's death but also because it was he who had maliciously set the fire in the first place.

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What did one Lacrosse player say to the other? Let's touch shafts

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What is worst then falling off a tree....... Falling off a bigger tree

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch".

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I am iron man 24 flavors in my van i am the icecream man i have met jackie chan

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What did the blind football player say to his coach? I cant see

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What's brown and sticky? A piece of toffee, which is brown and/or dark brown in color.

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What's worse than seeing Levi naked? Cancer.

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street he gets hit by an airplane

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What do you say to a black man on the street? Hello.

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*knock knock* Who's there? *Gorilla* Gorilla who? *Gorillas don't hoot, owls hoot*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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