Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it saw food on the other side the the farmer was going to chop his head off.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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A man is flailing his arms in the ocean. Help me, I'm drowning!, he screams. Some dude runs into the water, drags the man out, and is proclaimed a Hero.

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The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action

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you are driving down the highway, if two birds make a bee then how many pies can fly at once? None because I can't read

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Soooo... a black man walked into a bar and asked the bartender for a beer.

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a man walks into a bar he suffer's bad injuries by Mad

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Solely for our entertainment purposes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road It didint make it across

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Roses are red Grass is greener I think of you when I play with my weiner

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...............................................................hi

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Yeah I was beginning to enjoy that as well, but I used "timed hypnosis" I have not seen it been coined elsewhere yet, not that I learn hypnosis anymore, I kinda teach it covertly to whoever I believe can use it responsively. "Timed hypnosis" is not really based upon a set amount of time after all time is relative, and our subconcious does know that and the subconcius understands that we did not invent time just because we made some fucking dials spin around" Now, timed hypnosis is based on a purpose, for example: "I will go into a trance until I am done teaching my new buddy how covert hypnosis works and teach her to use it subconciously" But now I made you aware of that, so you can use it consciously as well, the real magic here is that the subconcious is so much more efficient and powerful than the conscious mind that it would not even be neccesary to have a concious mind, except for one thing.

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What was the leg less and armless mans favorite type of music? Nubstep

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What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Easter? Hepatitis.

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Q: What does a baby and an old man have in common? A: They both pee in public

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a man walks into a bar. he gets a beer and talks to his friends. he then goes home.

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What do you call a orphan with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Scrood

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A shark ate your mom

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Two gay men walk into a bar. Holding hands.

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giddy goat

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im in stttttttttiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittttttttttttttttttccccccccccccchhhhhhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssss

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Knock, Knock? Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Why are you crying? I'm not crying. Oh.

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why did the chicken cross the road? cause kade touches himself at night

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why did dinosaurs get extinct? i don't know i was not there to see it!!!!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops