what did reed read? the most recent anti-joke

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What do you call a kid with one arm and an eye-patch? Names.

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Whats worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being stabbed.

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Barack Obama

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Where was Sally when the bomb went off? Everywhere...

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Why can't Demetrius swim? Because he has a genetic disorder where he is paralyzed from the waste down, so he is therefore incapable of propelling himself through the water

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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Who did the Vampire bite? No one because vampires aren't real.

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How do you kill a blonde? Cut off the bloodflow to their vital organs.

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What did the chicken say to the dog? Well, since chickens can't talk, they both stood there in an awkward silence.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Hit by a bus Why did the bus driver drop his coffee? He hit the boy

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What do you call a black man who flys an airplane? A Pilot

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, and says nothing. Ducks are incapable of speech and therefore it would be physically impossible for a duck to say anything. Where the duck walks up to does not partake in the matter.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Realizing on your deathbed that you regret the life you've lived and hate the person you've become.

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your moms my other ride

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I hate it when people talk about concentration camps... my grandad died in one He fell off the guard tower

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? Neither has he.

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A blind man walks into a bar. He didn't know there was a step and tripped loudly. Other bargoers saw this and helped him up, he was given a beer on the house.

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So a chef, a soldier, and a lawyer are riding in a plane. The pilot has a heart attack and they all die.

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So, a guy sees a guy, and asks that guy if he's seen a guy who knew this guy who saw this guy who killed this guy, who knew a guy who is Barack Obama's best friend. Oh wait, Barack Obama doesn't have any friends.

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What's Red and Invisible? No Tomatos

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elen degeneres is straight....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? chickens are very unintelligent, and often walk around aimlessly with no purpose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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