A homeless man walks into a house He is invited to a lovely lunch and then beaten to death

What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizz

If John has 50 candybars and eats 45 of them how many does he have left? Diabetes.

A chicken crosses the road as a car comes by. The driver pumps the brakes and stops the car just before hitting the chicken. The chicken crosses the road safely. Onward, my noble steed !

What do you call a black astronaut? It depends on what his name is.

Roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme fridge

What's the difference between a duck

A pirate walks out of a bar. He drowns in a puddle.

What would happend if two nyan cats crashed into each other? It would be a great impact and we'd all be sad.

Did you hear about the mail man without a mail truck? He walked

Why did the boy get hit by the ice cream truck? The driver of the ice cream truck was drunk

what happens every day? People die

What did little Jimmy say when he saw a group of dancing blue penguins dressed as cannibal clowns with saucers on their head ? "What the f*ck"

How did the little boy get down from the top of the empire state building... He took the elevator

Nothing if you heard a loud sound or something that was me dropping the phone, by accident, its busted, I will call you when and if all of your "facts" turn out to be true, Hey, had no idea my doppelganger would be so down to earth by the way, so I am sleepy, what about you?

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

A man goes to an amusement park. He heads straight for the roller-coaster and gets in line. When he gets to the front, the ride operator informs him that he is too short to ride. "You must be at least 48 inches, sir, you just barely miss the mark, I'm sorry, I can't let you ride." The man is sad, but he doesn't let this little discrepancy ruin his day. He then gets in line for a different ride.

ahhh finally removed the splinter I've had for quite some time now. Hopefully that was the last one I'll get for a while...touch wood

Roses are red Violets are blue Black people are black They are inferior

Yo mama is so stupid that she is currently taking courses in a community college to get her degree in business so she can have a well-paying job.

A baby seal walks into a club

What did the black man say to the asian? Hey.

What's fat and ginger? My dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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