- Do you want to hear a joke? - No. - Ok.

you and your family will die tonight

Hi what I lug you

What do you call a bird with no wings? Dead

Why could the kid not finish his homework? Because it flew out the window on the way to his parents funeral

A man walks into a bar. He is genetically predisposed to alcoholism, and it's destroying his family.

what is big, white, and can't climb a tree? a fridge

Why couldn't the skeleton cross the road? Because it was dead, thus incapable of independent movement.

whats the differnce between a cadilack and a pile of dead babies? theres no cadilack in the back of my car1 >.>

What's behind Chuck Norris' beard? His chin

Why was the boy crying? Because he had AIDS

What happened when rudolf bucked Santa? Santa ripped his hooves off and started hitting his nose until it stopped glowing

What is the defference between an apple and a banana? Horses, because vests have no sleeves.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.. wait wut are u a bitch Violet are not freakin blue its Purple

What do you get when you cross a celebrity with drugs? A highly probable circumstance.

A Mexican, a black guy, and a Muslim are riding in the back of a car. Who is driving? Their friend Keith.

I was born.

When your scuba diving why do u jump off backwards beacause if u jump forwards than u witll still be in the boat!!!!!!

a black guy walks into a park with a group of five other black guys. they then proceed to have a nice picnik and play frisbee with a little white boy.

hey, my names mark.

What did the ocean say to the black guy? Nothing, it just shot him.

Justin's hair

One morning a man was frustrated at the dining table. His wife ask "What's wrong?". He says "I can't fit this stupid puzzle pieces together." His wife asks "What's it a picture of?" The man says "A rooster" The wife says "Honey, put the cornflakes back in the cereal box." The man says "no".

A man walks into a bar. He proceeds to begin his bartending shift.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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