Is the boy sleeping? No, he's dead!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Two guys walk into a bar. The third guys ducked.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the surrealist go to the doctor? Knock Knock.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the man cross the road? Because the light turned green

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the zuccini fly? I was in an acid trip.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

hahahahaha thats not funny

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do u call a black man playing a jumping sport? I don't know but it is totally normal.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the blonde get for Christmas? A Brain

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: "How does a monkey hide in a jungle?", A:"Paint its balls red and sit in a cherry tree" , Q:"What is the loudest noise in the jungle?", A: "A native picking cherries"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

how do you know Newcastle are losing? its 5 past 3

thumb_up thumb_down +11

I would rape her

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Where do snowmen keep their money? Snowmen don't have money

thumb_up thumb_down +11

If life gives you lemons, Eat them.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the duck say to the moose? Quack

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did pinocchio want to become? Hepatitus free.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats worse than a pile of dead baby's? Being raped by a giant scorpion. Well that escalated quickly. Also i'm gonna call the cops.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what does the black guy order for a drink at the bar. kool aid

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did little Billy fall off his bike? Anwser: because a refridgator hit him.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Dude 1: Hey, ya see these coins here? Dude 2: ya, what about em'? Dude 1: would you say you see these pretty often? Dude 2: yup... :/ Dude 1: so would you call them COMMON CENTS!?!?!?!?!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a homicidal maniac.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops