Knock knock whos there? Its me, your doorbell is obviously broken Okay, hold on a sec. Please hurry up, its really cold I cant seem to find my key Its probably on the coffeetable, where you always keep it. No, its not there Check the floor underneith Oh, right, there it is.

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I am a dog.

Why did they bury the pope on the side of the hill? Because he is dead

Why was the man full? He ate a meal.

A black man and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? Nobody, the car is parked while they look at a map for directions because doing that while you are driving would be very dangerous and could result in a collision.

What's the difference between a taxidermist and an astronomer ? They have a different job.

Why was the boy wearing pyjamas? It was his bed time.

why did hellen keller kiss a girl? another blind date

A ship wrecks in the South Pacific ocean. Only one man survives. He swims to a semi-deserted island, and is later eaten by the cannibal inhabitants

if quiz is quizzal whats test?

squirrels with massive bonerss

A fish walks into a bar Fish dont walk

Why did your mom cross the street? She didn't. She was a home. Making me a sandwhich.

my eyes hurt from what? being open too much

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend "I know. You need to quit gnawing when you're giving me a blow job."

How many jews can fit into a car? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, 6 million in the ash tray

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

How do you fit 1000 Jews into a car? You can't. You'd need a much larger vehicle.

What did the pear say to the orange? Orange ya gonna say hi? What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk.

Q:Why did the man throw his clock out the window A:Because he didn't like his clock

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

What did the paraplegic boy get for christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Milkman. Milkman who? I've been coming here for 14 years and you don't even know my name? I helped take your mother to the hospital for crying out loud! I held you in my arms as a baby! And you don't even have the decency to remember MY NAME?! I'm sorry I don't live in a house that allows milk and other groceries to be delivered, I'm sorry that I wasn't born into a nice family with a nice home! I'm sorry that I have had to come here EVERY WEEK FOR FOURTEEN YEARS and you can't even remember my NAME! My name! I left my family for christmas one year to go pick up that elmo doll for you when you were a kid! I saved you from that burning treehouse! I helped you with you're 3rd grade science fair project and you won! YOU WON! We took a picture together that i have kept in my wallet. And i proudly say here's me and timmy. ME AND TIMMY! TIMMY! But no...you don't need to know my name. Well good day sir. You shan't see me again.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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