What's faster than a Jew running after a penny? A car.

Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? Because he crossed the road

Knock knock. Is someone there?

Why did John go outside? His house was on fire.

What do a black man and an apple have in common? They are both carbon based life forms.

How do you burn a lot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

Whats white and looks like a bunny? a rabbit

how do you make a door cry? twist its nob

Dave: My wife just gave birth! The baby is doing good. John: You mean doing well?

Why was Newton surprised when the apple fell on his head? Because he was sitting under a pear tree.

Why did someone see a penguin walking in the desert? They were dreaming, because Penguins waddle and live in the Arctic.

A little boy starts to be followed by a man in a large white van. They come across an intersection, the boy turns left, and the man turns right.

why did the chicken cross the road? well he usually takes the bus to his job but he missed it so he had to walk. Unrelated to this, he works at KFC

Q)What is the best way to get the bitches? A) You shouldn't try. You could go to prison on bestiality charges.

What did the Pope say to the old homeless man who asked him for a blessing? Hahaha, no I won't give you a blessing

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

what does the NAACP stand for? Now Apes Are Called People.

Do you know what my favorite rhetorical question is?

What caused the Berlin Wall to come down? Gravity

Women's rights.

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

Have you heard the joke about the Swedish surgeon who found a frog in his patient's stomach? Yes, you've told me it before.

Q: What do you call a grammatically incorrect horse? A: An horse

How many blind men does it take to change a light bulb?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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