Your mom.

What have a blueberry and a raspberry got in common? They both can't ride a skateboard

What's the difference between a truckload of bowling balls and a truckload of dead babies? One is easier to unload with a pitchfork.

why can't you hear a pterodactyl pee? Because the "p" is silent

What do you do with a dog with no legs? Take it for a drag.

How many vampires does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Vampires do not exist

Why did the monkey die? he was stapled to a grenade

Knock knock Who's there Banana Bananas can't talk. Crap he's on to me

Your mother is a stupid bitch. For real.

What do you call a partially deaf obese man? Anything you want, it's unlikely that he'll hear you. If he does manage to catch what you said, your chances of outrunning him are very good considering that he's likely to tire before you, unless you're overweight yourself of course. If this is the case then perhaps you should hit the gym, obesity is a growing problem in the Western world and greatly increases your chance of heart disease and/or diabetes.

Ever heard of the dumb blonde joke? You probably wouldn't get it.

Knock Knock. Who's there? (a police officer steps in and says): What is red and green and peed all over? I dont know Im sorry to say, but its your mother. A group of teens killed her and defiled her body with urine. She was wearing green.

Justin Beiber

Knock Knock! Who's there? John Simons. This joke lacks a punchline. Yes, yes it does.

go up to some one and say "i told you it would happen" with a straight face and walk away. it should cause a LOT of confusion.

How did the polar bear get the bottle of coke? He killed the little boy

What do you call it when you mix a raccoon with an 18-wheeler? A bloody mess on the highway. That smells like cheese

The last time Jesse saw his **** was the day..........oh wait it's never happened

Guess what your birth certificate really is. An apology letter from the condom factory.

What are the two biggest jokes in College Football? Auburn and Florida! Roll Tide!

I may have alzheimer's but at least I don't have alzheimer's.

i lost the game

whats more annoying than being raped by a giant scorpian? finding out that half the anti-jokes are terrible

Why wasn't Jesus born in Poland? Because if he's an actual historical figure he would have been born in modern day Palestine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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