Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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sdasdadasdasd

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Q-What do you call kids who go to school? A- Students.

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Whats worse than finding a real joke on anti-jokes? -Nothing

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

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What did the duck say to the Pope? Quack.

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Terry Stockton wasn't really hit.

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Whats red and hurts your teeth? A brick

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Mary had a big white van, a big white van, a big white van, Mary had a big white van, where did my friend go? (sing the song)

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What did the skeleton say when he was horny? Nothing. Skeletons are not living and therefore cannot be horny.

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Abstract thinking part one of... One: What kind of idiot tries to run trough a wall, rather than to just use the door? The "Idiot" is in a cell whose walls are made of thin wood plates, the door is made of steel and locked. How I cured my own damn anxiety five hundred of one: Now this is real see? I got stressed, damn it was like something that was not me but my body scared as shit began fearing for its life right my arms shaking like fuck sweat and all that crapa? So I got pissed got in front of the mirror, stared at myself and shouted "GODDAMN BODY YOU THINKS YOU CAN CONTROL ME? IF YOU DO NOT STOP BEING SO FUCKING AFRAID OF DEATH! THEN I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF!" So yeah unconventional indeed, but it worked for five times, and I never had to use it anymore. Moral: My own body and every fucking cell of it, is not the only one that fears me more than death.

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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What do giant panda bears eat? giant bamboo

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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What job did the black man apply for?.. Several, its a downward economy.

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Why did the black family cry? Tyler Perry died

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An man walked into a bar. Unbeknownst to him, the bar happened to be a having a Rave party. The man, having epilepsy, proceeded to have a seizure. Luckily, a paramedic was there and saved his life.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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how did the jewish man die He had a fatal hard attack

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You want to know how I know you're gay You want to have sex with a person of the same sex

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Did you hear the one about the man who kept losing his memory? I don't remember how it goes... by the way, did you hear the one about the man who kept losing his memory?

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What do you call it when a black man and a japanese woman get married? A wedding.

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Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she lost her balance.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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