2 men walk into a bar. 3 come out

thumb_up thumb_down -26

An Irishman, an American, an Australian, a Chinese man, a Turk, a Brazillian, a Canadian, a Jew, an African, a German, a Mexican, a Norweigian, a Swede, a Spaniard, a Russian and an Indian walk into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's big, red, has green and puple spots and responds to "here boy"? Nothing, not to my knowledge anyway!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call a black man with a hammer in his head? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What do you call two dog? dogs

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A horse walks into a bar. Being unable to comprehend human emotion, he shits all over the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A woman who lived alone with her parrot left her apartment to run to the store, forgetting that a plumber was scheduled to come and fix her sink. A few minutes later, the plumber arrived and knocked on the door. The parrot inside called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replied, "it's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink." The plumber waited for a bit and, seeing that nobody was coming to the door, knocked again. The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replied, a little more loudly, "it's the plumber! I've come to fix the sink!" Again the plumber waited. After a few more minutes, he knocked again. The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber yelled, as loudly as he could, "IT'S THE PLUMBER! I'VE COME TO FIX THE SINK!" Still, nobody came to the door. The plumber banged the door repeatedly, The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber screamed "IT'S...THE...PLUMBER!!! I'VE...COME...TO...FIX...THE...SIIIIIIINK!!!" and then, consumed with rage, clutched his chest and fell over dead from a stress-induced heart attack. A few minutes later, the woman returned home and, while opening her door, noticed the plumber lying dead in her hallway. She looked at her parrot and asked, "Who is it?" The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?"

thumb_up thumb_down -28

why did the nazi eat the jew? He didn't

thumb_up thumb_down -28

If a woman was born in China, raised in France and got married and died in New Orleans, what is she? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Whats worse than missing the bus? Having the short bus picking u up

thumb_up thumb_down -28

If Jimmy has $5, and he finds $20 on the street, how much money does Jim have? None. He was mugged by a black man.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did the chicken cross the road? Solely for our entertainment purposes.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

7

thumb_up thumb_down -30

whats black and red all over? a chalk board

thumb_up thumb_down -30

what happens when a girl poops? she wipes her butt.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

what happens when an Indian walks into a bar? they realize they found there way home

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Two gay men walk into a bar. Holding hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the chicken cross the road?

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Knock knock. who's there? Strawberry! Strawberry who? Pickle!

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Bat-mobile? - "Robin, get in the Bat-mobile"

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What's big and white?

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Canada AYY

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Why Did The Black Guy Eat Watermelon? Because he lives in south africa where they are commonly grown and needed a healthy snack.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops