What's brown and sticky? Poo.

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? Because he crossed the road

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Your mom is so fat that when she went to the Doctors, He said she was slightly over weight

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whats the difference between 100 dead babies and a ferrari? the ferrari is not in my garage.

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What do you call a dead baby lying in the road? A Tragedy

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A man has only two fingers on one hand, and everybody calls him two-fingered Mike. Why? Because his fingers were lost in a tragic accident at birth, and his parents, who were considering calling him Mike, decided to lengthen the name because it seemed appropriate.

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic, so to make his activities in the bar into a joke would be disrespectful and inconsiderate.

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What do you call a black guy who sells drugs? a pharmacist

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Your momma's so fat: She feels excluded by mainstream clothing outlets.

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Because you killed my Llama. He was my best-friend.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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(This is a joke made up by the young son of a friend of mine many years ago. It is still one of my favorite jokes.) Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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who is gay and sits next to me in my architecture class? James and austin!!!!

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whats 2 + 2? a black guy flying a kite

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? I don't know it really depends on the car, usually about 2 in the front, 3 in the back and... That's about it

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women's rights.

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Fun fact: If you took the skin of an average person and laid it flat you would have enough to get a pretty serious criminal conviction, amirite?

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Why did your mom cross the road? She Tripped and started rolling

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

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What did your last slave die of? Terminal Cancer

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Two men walk into a bar, they weren't looking where they were going.

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What happened when the man lost his sandwich? He couldnt eat.

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Your mother was a hamster, And your father smelt of ElderBerries!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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