What do you call a pencil that's been broken in half? 2 pencils

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Why was the girl crying? Because she was brutally raped

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Whats faster that a Mexican with your TV? A speeding bullet.

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How does camon Die? He kills himself because he didnt make it into the marine corps

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God said onto john "come forth and receive eternal life" john came fifth and received a toaster.

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A pink bird and a pink elephant was out flying. Then something happened.

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Roses are red, My watch is gold now get on your knees and do as your told

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A blonde walks into a bar... ...she got rufeed.

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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A pregnant woman walked into a bar what did she say? Can i have a drink

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No-one because that's not feasible.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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How do you make a mimer to speak? Shot him in both knees and cut of he's ear

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LIFE INSERT COIN TO BEGIN!!! SELECT DIFFICULTY EASY

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So how does the chicken cross the road? He doesn't, chickens live on farms.

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A whale's vagina

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Person 1: I have one question: What are those?!?!?!?!?! Person 2 : Their shoes you Dimwit. Person 1: (runs away crying) -by Mekkhi

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Why did schlomo fall off the swing He lost balance because Muslims threatened to kill him

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Why did Pamela Anderson cross the road? To meet me.

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Why did the black guy cross the street? Because his master ordered him to

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Who is the girl that has had sex with over 10 guys? Georgia Hidi

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Trolololollolololololololololololololol

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Pokemon go: Team mystic

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a man walks into a bar, and says "can i get a beer please?" the bartender hands him his beer, and as soon as the man starts to take a drink, the man dies of a massive heart attack because of his unhealthy lifestyle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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