Why couldn't Austin eat his noodles? He was a horse, and horses don't have hands, silly goose!

Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

Why are you so fat? Cause I eat a lot.

A large man goes into a restaurant and places his order The waiter asks if he would like the weight watchers menu He says no because he doesnt care about his weight

How are baseball and basketball the same. They aren't football.

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

Why was the fat guy sad? his daughter is slowly dying of anorexia why was the fat guy sad? his daughter was raped by a giant panda bear

A blind man walks into the girls bathroom.

whats better then a pile of dead babies? 2 piles of dead babies

Why did the father beat his daughter? To alleviate stress.

why is john so fat years of over eating

what do you get when you cross a scotsman who doe'snt know anything about football,and a indian who doe'snt anything about football .blackburn rovers , and a good night out.

You wanna hear a joke about my penis Nevermind, it would be inappropriate of me to say such a thing.

I went to the zoo the other day there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu. By Nathan Luque CARROTS!!!

What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter ponder with cheese.

You're smart... And I can tell a joke.

roses are red and violets are in fact violet

Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? People cross roads all the time, each for their own personal reasons. Questioning their motives is generally accepted as being unnecessary, as it is a relatively safe action as log as one is careful and heeds the laws of traffic.

ati jokes are not to be funny. what about u

Where did Suzy go during the bombing? Everywhere

A black man went to jail while a white man received $200 dollars. They were playing a friendly game of monopoly.

why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuable prizes

My childhood friend said she had a bad breakup with her husband (yeah husband), and that she needed a really stiff one. Come on! How was I supposed to know she was talking about alcohol! She did blush and smile after I pulled my pants down however, that`s like seven out of ten right? I mean I was just trying to help a friend out right? And myself, fine myself, but it will be a total win/win situation, you know... Those where you win twice? "Dont worry, Im not comming" *pewpew*

A man walks into work and massacres 20 due to a mental illness.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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