A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A newborn, an infant, a teenager, a person in their 20s, a person in the 40s, a person in their 60s, a person in their 70s, a person in their 80s, and a little old lady who is about 105 walk into a bar. Wait, infants can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock Who's There? Your Best friend. Did you forget what I looked like?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than the holocaust? The sun exploding.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock knok ! Whos there? Buhu ! Buhu Who? Why are you crying?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you get a blind man out of a tree? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What does a camel wear at war? Camelflage

thumb_up thumb_down -2

People used to throw rocks at whores. Now they're throwing wood. *Hint. Hint.*

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you fit 3 squirtles two bulbasors and a charmander in a smart car You poke em on

thumb_up thumb_down -2

if a man is alone in the forest, and there are no women around to hear him...........is he still wrong?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay is irrelevant.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you protect yourself from fire? Kill an orphan and nail its bones to your skin.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

My heart is in my hands. Or maybe it's yours. Either way it's mine now. You won't need it anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock knock Who's there? Doorbell repairman

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the blind football player say to his coach? I cant see

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the Romans conquer everyone? They were power-hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what can you give to a millionaire to make him happy? sex

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what did batman say to robin before he got in the batmobile get in the batmobile

thumb_up thumb_down -4

You know what's funny? Lot's of things.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How did the man jumping out of the plane at 33,000 feet survive? Because he had a parachute

thumb_up thumb_down -4

"What happened to John after he got drunk 12 years ago"- police "I don't really don't know that question"- John Jr.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock Knock! Who's there? John Simons. This joke lacks a punchline. Yes, yes it does.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

how do 2 gay guys walk... one pounces into the others butt

thumb_up thumb_down -6

guhhjghkjghjgkwefyuwefgehdfbfryfgwdfhdbfadhfbewifoyqgefhqjdbsjdkdfbnqerwifuqbdjsa wuefgeyfgdshkjjhgfiuyegfdhfbdksabnfehwbfeiofqwrypweqiryewpiryewufhdjfbxncmsbahewf bdcuhbwewhuxnyfurgbcyuiwfbewcyiubnyfeurieixybnqweircbnewociuxnbweu crbweyuicyxbreuwxcybewuoiqbyxeowucybnqweucbnowieywicybrqweiubncyqoweubnrcyuowiebno

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops