Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate the mac and cheese before it was cool.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit in the back of the bus? Every seat wsa taken, and the back was her only option

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what do you call anybody eating at mcdohnalds? hungry, diabetic people

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I dont know if you know this but i have a penis

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses only the finest ingedients.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I killed someone today. :D

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's the difference between a duck? Nothing, they're both the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did Johnny stop walking halfway to school? A fridge fell on him.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I had a great joke to tell you. I didn't want people stealing my ideas so I didn't write it. Haha

thumb_up thumb_down +14

elen degeneres is straight....

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A duck walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand hey! Got any guns

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the man say to his wife right before they got married? "I do."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Lack of experience.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

which sex position produces the ugliest children? go ask ur mom

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the gay man do last night? Had a curry

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A guy walks into a bar... Ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock knock Who's there? Batman Batman who? Because he was

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is black and white and red all over? a nun that got raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? Jews are people

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops