whats long and pointy and guys always have to brag about whos got the biggest one? their christmas trees

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Knock knock Who's there? Honey, just let me in. This bloody game can't go on for an hour. I'm cold out here.

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What did the cat say to the elephant? Meow.

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knock knock whos there the game _______I LOST THE GAME_______

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Why was the T-Rex so bad at math? Cause it was stupid

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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What happened when 7 8 9? Six was afraid! HAHAHaha....ha.... wait, no. I told that wrong....

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What do you call a comedian who can;t make people laugh? A bad comedian.

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Q: What happened to the blonde who tried to commit suicide? A: She died.

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Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb Mary had a little lamb and the doctor was surprised

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why'd the baby cross the road it was stapled to the chicken

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Johnny Manziel is the best quarterback ever (this isn't a joke only a true statement)(this is a remake of a previous joke)

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Man 1: WHAT THE HELL?!?! Man 2: There is no verb in that sentence

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What did the Pope say to the little boy? Look both ways before crossing the street

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What did the murderer get for Christmas? Executed.

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What do you call a black man who goes to college? A scholar.

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The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, "Oh...Well, that's not so bad. At least I don't have AIDS."

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How do gay guys have sex with women?? They dont, they are gay.

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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Why did the dude fall? Because he tripped over a stick.

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what did the man with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a new hat

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yuor momma so fat she has type 2 diabetes

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What d u tell Simba when he's moving to slow? Muvasa

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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