What happens to men who grow up. They are probably taller

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Why is it impossible to travel faster than the speed of light? Because it travels pretty darn fast.

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Q. How do you kill a dumb blonde? A. Shoot her.

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Why shouldn't you play poker in the woods? Due to the stereotypical lack of human population in such an area, it would be excruciatingly difficult to find a partner with which to play competitive card games. I suggest trying solitaire instead.

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Why does Jeremy Kyle love his job? Because he gets to make idiots look like bigger idiots.

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why is red the first color in the rainbow? I don't know go ask a scientist.

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How will Jesse die? His mom doesnt have any food left (or money) so she eats him, and then jesse's fat little brother farts on his obese corpse

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How do you kill a woman? Let her drive

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What do you call a black kid with a backpack? I don't know.

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roses are red, violets are red, a girl had her period in my garden.

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What did suzie do when she dropped her cookie? She died because it was secretly a bomb

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Knock Knock Who's There? Your Best friend. Did you forget what I looked like?

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What do you say to a friend when they're feeling down? The Game

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I love results day! for every A* I get 30 pounds! everything else I cut myself.

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What's black, dangerous and sits in a tree ? A crow, with a machine gun !

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This is my first joke don't ????mine. You did didn't you.

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Q: What's worse than dropping your phone in water? A: Throwing water at your phone.

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Why can't vegetarians eat mushrooms because I can't urinate over a scotch bonnet :/

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Near the tower of London, a woman says to her friend: "You know, I had a feeling my son would come out, and the other day, he did." "What was your first clue?" "We're British."

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Why did the wife leave her husband? Because they were having sexual differences and time restraints. The husband worked nightshifts as a nurse while the woman stayed home and took care of their child. The husband confessed he never wanted a child in the first place, and that having sexual intercourse with her didn't truly satisfy him.

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Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They beat her.

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Why did the man go bald? He had cancer

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Q:Why did the chicken cross the road A:He didn't he was tortured then killed and turned into a sandwich that you can buy for the price of $1.00

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A black man, a Mexican man and a white man walk into a bank. The black man reaches into his bag and pulls out his bank card, the Mexican and the the white man do the same as they need to withdraw money.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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