What did the little boy get for Christmas? Presents.

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

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If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

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What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

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What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

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Whats green and miss centowski hates a gas chamber :D lets be friends

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Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

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A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

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Linda: See that rainbow? Isn't it beautiful? Bart: I'm color blind.... Linda: Well...this is awkward...

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AFTER PONDERING UPON YOUR SUGGESTION... I HAVE CONSIDERED, THOUGHT, SOUGHT TROUGH THE YELLOW PAGES OF WISDOM AND MIGHT, AND MY ANSWER TO THAT SUGGESTION IS... A DEFINITIVE, FIRM AND MANLY... Moral: MAAAAYBEEEEE?!?!?

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Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

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What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

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So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

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I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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How do you get a black guy to learn how to read? Find a stolen book and tell them that it's the recipe for the spices in fried chicken.

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what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops