Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

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What's worse than missing your flight? 9/11

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what kind of dog can tiptoe

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What do you call a mouse having sex? A spouse.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

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Hello.

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What can fit between breasts? Is long? And gets hard when you jerk it? A seatbelt.

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What size pants did the gorilla wear? An abnormaly large pair compared to the average human because their weight and width are porportionaly larger for their speices.

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An Asian, a redneck, an Irish, and an Iranian walk into a bar. All but the Iranian were asked to go back to the parking lot and park their car to take up only one space.

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whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

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Q: Why is Little Johnny in the hospital with a bullet wound and a broken arm? A: I shot him of his bike.

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what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

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Why couldn't the teen go to the prom? He was busy working to help his mom recover from breast cancer.

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your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

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I put my baby in a microwave.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't.

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "There goes my income. I dont know how I'll support my family now, or keep my crops alive."

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A man walks into a bar.. and has a bomb strapped to his chest

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what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

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Knock knock. Who's there? Me. Oh.

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What do Michael Jackson and a T-Rex have in common? They're both dead.

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Question to make it sound like a racist joke? Politically correct answer that should not offend anyone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops