"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

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If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

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why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

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what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

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I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

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SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

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Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

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What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Q: How do you make a baby float. A: Put it in a blender and add ice cream.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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