What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

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How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb? Look. I just enjoy a few drinks every now and then. I mean, I can quit whenever I want to. That's no reason to start people calling names.. Wait, no. That's not.. Look. How much do you drink every day, huh? Why not ask that? And why do I have to be the one changing your stupid light bulb? If it's sooooo important that the light bulb be changed, do it yourself, you lazy bastard. Don't rely on other people to do your work for you.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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Justing Bieber walks in a bar. Everyone shoots him.

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Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

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If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

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Did you hear the joke about the man and the serial killer? Neither did the man since he was stabbed repeatedly and thrown into the bottom of a lake.

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

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Cripples are lame.

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If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

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Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

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rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

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Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

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Why did timmy's face turn red? Early that morning Timmy was brutally attacked by the local street gang which proceeded to smack timmy's face with a baseball bat and smearing the blood with a dirty rag.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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