Roses are red. Violets are violet.

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What is white and hard to catch? A refrigerator

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What did the white man say to the black man? Nice Pants

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How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

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An irishman walks into a bar and stays there until he goes home.

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What did Tyrone Jenkins say when Obama was elected? Nothing. He is not a real person, but merely a hypothetically existent man used only for the portrayal of a lacking punchline.

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Why did the man walk into a bar? Coz he felt like it.

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Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? Glasses

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What did the old women do when she found her husband dead? She had a heart attack and died as well.

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An anti-joke

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Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

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Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

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Non-Anti-Joke.com!

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Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

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What do you call a man with no arms? Disabled... some people can be so cruel.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he found out the oreo he slept with last night had aids and he wanted to make sure he didnt get the deadly disease so he went to the doctor to get tested.

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A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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YOUR MOMMA IS SO FAT WHEN SHE JUMPED FOR JOY........she didn't get stuck because there's nothing to get stuck in.

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what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

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Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

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How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

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The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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