Someone with a lame joke: What's black and white and red all over? Smart person who decides to mess with him: Nothing, if it is red all over how can it be black and white???????

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Whats green and gets you really high? A green airplane

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what duz 69 mean? its a number duhhhhhhh

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q: What did the vomiting man say to his friend? A: BLEEEAAARRRGGHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to his wife? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGGHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the waiter in the restaurant? A: BLAAAAAARGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Leonardo DiCaprio? A: BLEEEEAAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the convenience store clerk? A: BLAAAAAARRRGGGGHHHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to your mom? A: BLAAAARRRGGGHH!!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Barack Obama? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGHHHH!! Q; What did the vomiting man say to the King of Saudi Arabia? A: BLAAAAAAAAAAAEEEAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the bartender? A: BLLLEEEEAAAARRGHHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the funeral home director? A: BLLLEEEAAAARRRGGGHHH!!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What happened to the Jew who went to France? He had a very enjoyable time and visited many of the remarkable landmarks around the country.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A apple is red a banana is to never mind that joke sucks

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A polish guy Is sick of being made fun of for his ethnicity, so he decides that he is going to act Italian thinking that no one makes fun of Italians. He stays home for weeks to practice this and one day walks out, up to a store and says"eh, get me some lasagna and zucchini !" the man at the store asks if he's polish.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what is the best way to stand out from the croud? open up your butt hole and take a video for to put on dat jumbotron

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the parents say to their kid? You're adopted and we don't love you.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

My mom

thumb_up thumb_down -29

I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why didn't the little boy have arms or legs? Because they were savagely ripped off of him by a black bear on a very unfortunate camping trip.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What happened when the 16 year old told her mother she was pregnant? Her mother was extremely disappointed that her daughter did not stay faithful to an abstinent life but eventually became proud of the fact that she would soon be a grandmother.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What did the Mexican shoe salesman say to the man? Excuse me, do you whih way to main street?

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A black duck walks into a bar. Duck: "I'll have a beer." Bartender: " How you paying for that?" Duck: "Put it on the tax payers."

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops