Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

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How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

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What's worse than falling out of a tree and landing on a dog? Rape.

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How do you keep a black man from hanging around your tree? You cut the rope.

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I don't drink. I'm not 21.

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Knock knock Who's there Isabelle Isabelle who? Is-a-bell necessary on a bike

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What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

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What did the man say to th tiger? Nothing, a tiger is a dangerous and vicious animal. It then ripped him to pieces. Is family mourned after for a very long time till they came to grips with the death of the main income in their family. Aids

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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Knock Knock Whos there Boo OWWW YOU ASS WAT THE F*%^ (crying)

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What did the chair say to the fan? Nothing. Chairs and fans are objects so they do not have the physical ability to talk.

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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Q. There were 2 Mexicans in a car, who was driving it? A. The police officer.

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Yo' mama's so black the dark couldn't even see her.

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Q: pete and re-pete were on a boat, pete fell off. who was left? A: i dont know, but why did pete fall off in the first place, that dumb ass

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I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

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Q. Why was little Timmy crying? A. Because his sister died of cancer.

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Q. What do you get when you mix eggs, mashed potatoes and salt? A. A pretty good batter for mashed potato pancakes.

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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Two men walk into a bar The first man says to the bartender: 'Can I have a glass of H2O?' The second man says: 'Can I have a glass of H2O too?' The Bartender gives them both glasses of water because he is not irresponsible to serve hydrogen peroxide in his bar.

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What did helen keller say when she saw a talking horse? nothing. because she didn't see the horse and they also cannot talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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