What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a Welshman with a stick up his arse? A very odd man

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

This guy gets on a plane and leaves he takes a bite of a green Apple and says to sower then he takes a bite out of a red Apple and says to sweet so he takes a bite of a gernade and says to crunchy so the plane lands and he walks past a little boy crying and says little boy why are you crying because a green Apple came down and hit my dog in the head so he's walking along and sees a nether boy crying and says little boy why are you crying cause a red Apple came down and hit me on the head so he's walking along abd sees a little girl laughing little girl he says why are you laughing cause I farted and the building be hind me bluw up lol ????

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I don't have a girlfriend but I do know a girl who would get really mad if she heard me say that.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man walks into a house, and the next day was taken to the hospital for a minor concussion and a possible vision deficiency.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

how do you get rid of diahreah? Shove pepto bismo up your butt.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down -3

moonshine most none americans think its just when the moon shines we have another story

thumb_up thumb_down -3

whats the hardest answer ever? The one without a question.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

If you have three ice-cream cones, and you give away two, how many do you have left? Why would you give away your ice-cream? Eating it is the better option.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a over weight woman? Fat bitch.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a motorcycle nothing, I dont have either

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops