A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Put it on my bill."

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What do you call black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist bastard

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A man walks into a store. He purchases what he was intending to, walks out, and gets on with his day.

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why did the black man start crying? because his ancestors were treated horribly

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On September 11th 2001, A worker of North twin tower man woke up to find his dog had chewed on his brand new phone. He went down stairs and realized his kitchen window had been broken. Getting ready to leave for work and saw his radio had been stolen out of his car. After finally making it to work and settling down in his office he spilled coffee on his lap. Enraged, the man yelled, "How could today get any worse!?"

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What did the rabbi say to the Muslim? I don't know I wasnt there. But it probably had something to do with their varying religions.

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So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

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What's the difference between the WNBA and the NBA? The WNBA features female athletes, as oppose to the males of the NBA.

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? A fat kid sitting on you

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How did the black guy survive the bus crash? At the time of the bus crash, it was a segregated community, therefore no black people were allowed on buses.

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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Roses are red, and blood is too. But violets are purple. NOT FUCKING BLUE.

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

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What's worse than a bee sting? The holocaust What's worse then the holocaust? Two bee stings

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? There was no cross walk.

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

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A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

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A kid walks into the car and the dad says, "Wear your seatbelt".

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Someone: I like my coffee like I like my men Someone else: Black? Someone: No, tied up, shoved in a burlap sack, and dragged through the mountains.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops