What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Whats worse than going to jail for the rest of your life? Going to jail naked for the rest of your life.

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what do you get when a white woman and black man have a child? either a girl or a boy

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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Whats whats black, yellow, wnd green all over? The Jamacain flag

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why did they plain crash? cause of gravity stupid

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A black woman and a white woman are in a bar. They don't talk to each other though because they don't know each other. THE END.

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whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

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What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

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Roses are grey. Violets are a different shade of grey. Let's go chase cars. -Dog

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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"i once had a rabbit named socks.he was a funny little fellow until one day he got over excited and...well..." "did he...i mean..you know..did he...?" "what?lose a claw,throw up, sit in a pan of warm water until he calmed down?" "yeah! :)" "yes...but then he died."

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i want to watch t.v, how do u turn it on? idk, do u know how? idk either, i cant see or hear then y do u want to watch t.v wuts a tv?

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whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

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Why did the chicken cross the road To walk back

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what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

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what do you do when you see a black man punching a girl? act like you dont see it and get the hell out of harms way

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Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

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What do you call Charlie Sheen when he's on drugs? Charlie Sheen.

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What did the farmer say to little susie? I have a gun. Get in the car and dont scream or i will kill you

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why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops