Why Was the straight man in love ? because he was an intelligent human being who had the formula of understanding woman .

how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

Knock, Knock Who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill your neighbor. Can I have some flour?

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

What do you get when you stab a six year old with a pair of scissors and a machete? A very angry, potentially murderous mother out for revenge.

What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

A man walks into a bar............. The bar explodes and everyone dies

What's the difference between a microwave and hamster? They're both furry except for the microwave

What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

I was gonna make a gay joke but those are insensitive, and gays have feelings like everyone else

What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

Two muffins are in an oven one muffin says to the other muffin "It's hot in here" the other muffin says "Holy crap a talking muffin".

What happens if a Muslim leaves their bag on a bus? They quickly return onto the bus and get it.

Guess whats in my hand. Can you guess? A gun. Bam bam, you're dead. Haha

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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