"is it just me or is it getting really hot in here?" "the house is on fire and we are locked in"

Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinsons..

Why did the chick cross the road? To get to the brothel for hot lesbian love.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

I'm Coming

hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

What happened to the lady living in the present, crossing a street? Let's watch her and find out.

Knock Knock Who's there? Gilbert Gilbert who? Goddamn it David just open the door

a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

A guy punched himself. He then said ouch.

What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Presents.

Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

a man makes a bad joke

how do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? it doesn't matter. she can't climb up a tree with only one arm.

Chris Bosh's neck

Chuck Norris once jumped off of a 9 story building. He broke half of the bones in his body because he is 71 years old.

Identical jokes get different amounts of votes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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