Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

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despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

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Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

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Why couldn't the towel talk? Because it didn't have a language.

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Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

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what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

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John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

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What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

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What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

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Whats the difference between platinum blondes? Absolutley nothing they all look exactly the same.

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How are grapes and squirrels similar? They're both purple. Except for the squirrel.

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A Priest, a Rabbi and a Shaman walk into a bar. The Bartender looks at them and says "What is this a Joke?"

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Q: What did Peter say after a long day of work when he got home? A: Nothing, in fact he has job, home, family, or anyone to help him. His leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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What did the alphabetical soup spell for little Bobby? U gOt SUzie prEgnant ....... aGaiN

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Q. Why hasn't LeBron won a ring? A. Throughout his career, he has been placed with incapable teammates, thus leading to unsuccessful results. However, recently, he has been placed with individuals valid pod achieving such a goal.

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What do pancakes and Smokie Bear have in common? They both don't have aids

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a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

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Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

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Why was the little girl sad? She had a grown man sexually assault her.

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Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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