Q: What do you get when you have water, sodium C14-16 olefin sulfonate, glycerin, disodium lauroamphodiacetate, polysorbate 20, cocamidopropyl, betaine, PEG-6 Phenoxyethanol, PPG-15 Stearyl, Ether, Citric Acid, isocateth-20, Fragrance, Methylparaben, Tetrasodium EDTA, Xanthan Gum, Propylparben, Ethylparagen, and Camelia Sinensis Leaf Extract? A: All New Clean & Clear Oil Free Make-up Dissolving Foaming Cleanser.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What do you call a black man chasing after a macdonalds van? The fastest thing in the dessert.

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A black man logs on to facebook. He checks his news feed then logs off

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What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it's a grape and therefore unable to speak.

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What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

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H2O corndogs running around naked CC

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Why do zebras have stripes? I don't know.

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What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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Why does Joel get so many numbers from girls? Because he asks for them nicely.

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Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

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How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

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Whats worse than getting an "F" on a test? Stage diving with a kilt on.

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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Im taking a shit right now.

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Why can't Chuck Norris die? He can, he's just a normal human being.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get to the hospital before he lost to much blood from his stab wound.

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What is Brown And Sticky ? ......... a Stick

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why'd the Chinese kid die how the hell should i now

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your mum is so fat her patronas is a cake...

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Why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs? They don't want to advertise for McWeenies.

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What's worse than this That :(

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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