Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

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A guy gets murdered, because of the Reco act the whole gang he belongs to goes to jail as well. They cry in their beds

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My grandfather died in a Nazi Death Camp. He fell off a watch tower.

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Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

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A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

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An asian woman was driving along the freeway one day when a police officer pulled her over and arrested her, The officer arrested her because she had killed her husband 5 years ago and she thought she had gotten away with it.

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I will slap myself once for every like this joke gets!

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What happens when you die? Your body gets decomposed by bacteria

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What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

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How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

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From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

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why couldn't the boy talk? Because he was dead

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

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When a fat lady walks by what do u think? R u fat or pregnant

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Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

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Why didn't the Mother packed her son's lunch? Because her son Timmy likes to go to the canteen

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A Muslim walks into a bar. No-one survived the blast.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have no idea but I don't see why it would want to cross a road in the first place. It is a chicken.

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roses are red violets are blue tis poem makes no sense so screw you

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A mexican, Japanese, and American man are eating lunch one day at work by the window. The Mexican says, "Wow! If I get a taco one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The Japanese man says, "Wow! If I get a bowl or ramen one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The American says" If I get grilled cheese one more time, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The next day, the mexican jumped off because he got a taco. Then, the japanese man jumped off for getting ramen. Then, the American jumped off for getting a grilled cheese sandwhich. At the funeral, the mexican wife said, "Oh if i knew he was gonna jump, I would'nt have packed it." The japanese wife said, "If I knew he was gonna jump, I wouldn't have packed it either." The American wife didn't say anything because she was hit by a bus.

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- Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - KGB wh........... *slap* - vwe vwill ask the questions!!!!!!! - Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - Mom the KGB is here again....... - i dont care just answer the damn door - 5 seconds later nobody answers the door....... u here a crash and all of a sudden big men run in with guns - one comes over and slaps the mother while he continues to say " the KGB vwill vwait for no one!!!!!" - every body in the house is shot and and the KGB goees on to tlive normal lives........ for the KGB

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You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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