Why does Michael J. Fox have a good handshake? He has a firm grip

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

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Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He believed pedestrians had the right

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Sprechen zie deutsche? nein!

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What do you call a black man running faster than a white man? Usain Bolt

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there r three guys on a bridge. They r chinese,mexican,&american. They each have a bottle of beer. The chinese dude says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. Then the mexican says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. The american takes a drink of his and sets it down he looks at the mexican and says I have enough of these in my country and throws the mexican over the bridge.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no possible way for humans and chickens to communicate with each other. Therefore we cannot know.

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What direction do 5 gay guys walk? I am unable to answer that because they are all aspiring to work in different occupational fields.

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What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She didn't own a car.

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Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

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What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

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I like my coffe like my women Without a Penis

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the other ____?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

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what happens if you fart to hard? A.you shit yourself

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Knock knock. whos their! Grammar police. We'd like to have a little chat.

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Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

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Two lions are walking down the street. One lion says to the other, "where is everybody?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops