a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

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roses r nice violet are fine all be the 6 and you be 9

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Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

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What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

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Whats the difference between platinum blondes? Absolutley nothing they all look exactly the same.

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What did the old women do when she found her husband dead? She had a heart attack and died as well.

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You still alive? I used to be called proteus by the way, but then you disappeared and Neronism or watever its called now turned insane. I mean we killed you man! Out of mercy, you telling me a jacket changed you and everything? Where have you been? Six million followers? And all the shit that has made "moral man" the most lauded thing on Horsehead is you? Mind helping me make sense out of all of this?

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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Turkey Balls

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Roses Are Red...Rolo's Are Round....Pull Down Your Pants And Let's Down!

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why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

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I have a really good knock knock joke. You start. Knock knock. Open the door see who it is and then slam the door in your face THE END

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How do you upset Muslims? Kill their leader. Whoops, already did.

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Knock Knock Who's there? (Pause) Who's there? Hello? Bloody kids

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whats worse then being married to your dog eating your dog out

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What is worse than finding an apple in you worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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Why did the blonde turn down prostitution? She knows it is illegal and has better moral values than that.

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Two men enter a room. Two men and a baby leave the room...

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knock knock. who's there? your neighbor. o hi come one in!

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There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

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There were three soap salesmen in a bar. They were comparing how good they were at selling their wares. "I'm so good that I sell 60% of my soap bars each day," says the first salesman, bragging. The second one wasn't to be outdone. "I'm so good that I sell 80% of my soap bars," he declared. The last salesmen, who, up to the moment had been relatively quiet, suddenly said in a calm and collected manner, "Oh that's nothing. I'm so good that I sell all of my soap bars each day."

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jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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