Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

A Jewish person had a robber in their house. Who broke in? Adolf Hitler

Ding dong Who's there Electricity

What does the Priest say to the little boy? Size doesnt matter

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

How Many Women Does It Take To Parallel Park A Car ? Zero , The Husband Drove

Why was the new born on the orphanage's doorstep? He was an accident.

"Never trust what the internet says." - Abraham Lincoln

Did you hear about that guy? He had a wonderful morning.

your mammas so big that she needs paint rollers to put on lipstick

What's the best thing about Windows OS? It's very versatile and can run a wide selection of programs, tools, and games.

It is so hot out here, that it could melt an ice cube that was once in the freezer!

What do you do when you see a half-dead black man on the floor? Call an ambulance before he bleeds out causing sepsis.

What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

what's the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? dolphins aren't ghosts!!

(two firefighters are climbing an undersea mountain in Brazil) Why do elephants fear the natural causes of silver icecream cones? Because the cars in the parking garage jump the moon while doing jumping jacks.

What do you call a leper in a spa bath? Say excuse me Sir (or Madam), I notice you have leprosy, did you know that it is treatable? MDT for multibacillary leprosy consists of rifampicin, dapsone, and clofazimine taken over 12 months. Dosages adjusted appropriately for children and adults are available in all primary health centres in the form of blister packages.[17] Single dose MDT for single lesion leprosy consists of rifampicin, ofloxacin, and minocycline. The move toward single-dose treatment strategies has reduced the prevalence of disease in some regions, since prevalence is dependent on duration of treatment. World Leprosy Day was created to draw awareness to leprosy and its sufferers

What's round and bounces A basketball No!!!!!!! You dummy!!! Then what? Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yo Mama just died.

Why was the minority sad? Because the police beat him and then he was raped in jail.

Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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