Q. What happened to the girl who locked her keys in her car? A. I raped her.

"Why did Suzie fall off the swing?" "She had no arms." "What did Suzie get for Christmas?" "Cancer." "What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a tub of dead babies?" "I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage." "What did Suzie get for Christmas from me?" "My tub of dead babies."

Two guys are walking on a bridge. One has long hair. The other does not care.

what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Dandelions are red, I lit your garden on fire.

A blond walked into a bar. A guy picker her up and then they had sex.

A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? because she had no arms. --- Knock, Knock Whos there? Not Sally.

The 80's called. They need their couch back.

How did Helen Keller's parents discipline her? Hopefully not too sternly. There's not much trouble a blind and deaf girl can get into, one would imagine.

When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

why did the boy fall to the ground? He was struck by lightning

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

if ruddel jumped on your back what do you do leave him on or pull him offf? shoot him.

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve you kind here." The black man says, "Is it because I'm black?" The bartender replies, "Yes."

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Why are Asian people bad drivers? Coincidental cases of blurred vision.

Two babies are playing in a sand box.. They both start crying because they get sand in their eyes

Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

Maybe You'll Find Someone Else To Help You... Maybe Black Mesa... That Was A Joke...Haha...Fat Chance...

What do you call a rich black person? A: Oprah

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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