Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced by the man with a gun.

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Whats long, hard, and makes a girl excited? A penis.

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What's the difference between a piano and a fish? A piano is an instrument, fish is an animal

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Q:Why did the dwarf shout abuse at the bus driver? A: He had anger issues, and the price of the ticket was quite unreasonable.

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how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

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What do you call a black man with no arms? Trustworthy.

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roses are red violets are blue daffodils are yellow pansies are pink

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FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

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So this drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later she has a misscarrage

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How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your tits.

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Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

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Why is it good to date twenty eight year olds? Because there is twenty of them.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

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Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

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A guy is taking a pee in the ocean and a fish swims up and drinks the pee. The fish says "thanks for the lemonade."

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How are this and that alike? They aren't.

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Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

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What did the blonde say when she saw a tan button on her calculator? That must mean tangent.

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What did the jew say to hitler? SURPRISE!! IM YOUR NEW DADDY

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how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

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When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

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"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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