There are three guys on an airplane, a Korean, a Mexican, and an American. The pilot comes on the speaker and syays,"The plane is to heavy, throw out the thing you have most in your country." The Korean throws out an AK-47 and says,"We have to many of these in our country." The Mexican throws out a taco and says,"We have to many of these in our country." The American throws out the Mexican and says,"We have to many of these in our country."

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Q: What do you call an orange if it isn't orange? A: Nothing. Chances are you won't see it until it has ripened.

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Pete and Repeat were sitting in a boat. Pete fell off. I hope he was wearing a personal flotation device.

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Why did the chicken cross the dairy farm? Sex.

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What's Green and has Wheels? Ian Leighton... I LIED ABOUT THE GREEN

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

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Q:What did the turtle say to the jaguar? A: Well, a turtle and a jaguar live in totally different habitats, turtles live in water while jaguars live in grasslands, so it would be unlikely for them to cross paths and communicate. Turtles and jaguars are unable to speak and, if a jaguar were to talk to a turtle, the turtle would be unable to make out words because turtles can only pick up vibrations. And, they would have nothing to talk about.

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Why didn't the tv turn on? It wasn't plugged in

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HAVE A GOOD DAY. DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

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Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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Did you know that... Billy had a heart attack, it was sad. Now you know!

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your tits.

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Why is it good to date twenty eight year olds? Because there is twenty of them.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

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Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

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What did the contestant say to the game show host? If I don't win I will arrange to kill your family.

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how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

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yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

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Your mom's so fat that she is going to contract heart disease by age 30.

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Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

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I'm Batman.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops