Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

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Q: If your riding down the Nile on a boat and your boat springs a leak, how many boxes of pancake mix does it take to fix the hole? A: 58, because Koalas are marsupials

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What's twelve inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

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Do you know what the worst part about inbreeding is? - It's runs in the family!

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Yo mama so old when I slapped her on the back her tits fell off.

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

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Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

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What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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My friend on xbox told me about this cool clan. I went to join but I didn't like to wear the white robes

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A black man walks into a KFC, he then realizes that he is in the wrong store, and walks out.

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Why didn't Suzie ride her bike? Suzie's mother aborded her. She was never born.

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Q. why did the girl fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms.

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What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

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Ask me if I'm a truck! Are you a truck?! No.

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Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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How do you entertain a bored pharaoh? (written in 1600 BCE - Westcar Papyrus) -You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish

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"I'm so hungry!" "Hello so hungry, I am Matt. You must come from a very odd family if your name is " so hungry"!

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What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem doesn't make sense Potato

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how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? I shot him in the face.

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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