Whats the difference between a watermelon and babies I don't have a pile of dead watermelon in my basement

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suzy took a bath with bubbles what?......... I'm sure bubbles is a nice guy

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David Cameron

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Roses are red Violets are blue Its 2 in the morning Go the f+%& to sleep.

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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why was one black guy surrounded by ten white guys...... he was a story teller.

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Truth is Jordan Abu aita has a hairy @ss

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Ring Ring! Hello? Hello, is your refrigerator running? Yes it is Good.

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In Soviet Russia, man doesn't walk to the bar. The bar walks to the man!

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Why did William commit suicide? Because his grandmother had recently died of terminal cancer. His mother left him on the front step when he was two, and moved to Tennessee with her baby daddy.

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why couldnt the baby walk through the door? because it had a javeline through its head.

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what is the differrence between a boy and girl their oranges

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What did the Germans cook in their giant oven made for cooking jews? Jews.

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Knock Knock ...Does anybody know how to use a goddamn door bell these days?

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what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

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You know why no ones tried to kill Obama ? Picture him in an escalade!

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What happened to the child who's mother drank and took drugs while she was pregnant? Dead.

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WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

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Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman

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This guy went to the store because he needed potatoes. So he asked the clerk where the potatoes were at and she said "Isle fiveeeeeee!" So he went there and there were no potatoes ! hahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahajhahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahhahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahahhahaahhahahahahahahaahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhaahhahaahahahahahhhhahha

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To Daniel You must have been born on a highway cuz thats where most accidents happen

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? That boy that dropped a perfectly good ice cream cone from a road accident involving a bus due to lack of road safety awareness Oh yeah, and I guess the fact that he probably died or was injured for life is pretty bad too

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What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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