How old was the baby when it took its first steps? That question is impossible to answer due to the fact the parents had an abortion and the fetus remained unborn.

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What does NASCAR stand for? Non-athletic sport centered around rednecks.

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What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

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Whats Worse then finding a worm in your apple. Finding a real joke on anti-joke.com

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what do you do with a drunken sailor? take him back to port because he's not in a right state of mind to be on board a moving vessel

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How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

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A praying mantis is very graceful

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mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

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Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

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what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue Did you think I'd actually cry over you? I said I loved you You believed it was true Well guess what baby You just got played too! ??????

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A child finally stood up to the school bullies! Recently the news did a story about a school shooting.

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What do you call someone that has befriended a fisherman? Fishermans friend Moral: Strongest there is.

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Why did the black man lose his leg? Because he was kidnapped and tortured.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Ryan

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why was the little boy brutally murdered? there was a serial killer in his town.

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Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock knock. I've got a gun. Knock kn [*BANG!*] [L]

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Now that we got our colors straight. Hey, how ya doin?

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What's worse than dying of boredom? ...Being stabbed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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