What do you do to a woman who has a black eye? Punch her in the other eye so that they match.

A man with no legs walks into a bar. Just kidding...

eyebrows up means ur flirting this isnt a joke dont laugh

Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit a talking Muffin."

A. why'd the chicken cross the road? B.a dog got hit by a bus.

What's the safest way to tell a racist joke? Ask everybody who might hear the joke if they would be offended by a racist joke.

awkies when jamie and jacob hook up, and u have to tell the dog..i maen danni that this has been going on for 2 months

Why couldn't the immigrant who was brand new to America hold a conversation with anyone? He was mute.

what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

What separates man from animal? Divorce.

Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

When it comes ro the zodiac my grandmother was a cancer and... She ws killed by... A giant crab

how did harry styles get in one diretion god

What did the hand say to the face? Nothing because body parts cannot speak.

What's funnier than 10 dead babies? 11 dead babies.

Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

When life gives you lemons, go sell them for crack.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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