What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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A man walks into a house, and the next day was taken to the hospital for a minor concussion and a possible vision deficiency.

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Kevin+Sean sitting in a tree enjoying mcdonald's free wifi.

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WHY IS THIS SENTENCE CAPITALIZED? BECAUSE CAPS LOCK IS ON.

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Suck pussy

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Want to burn 3000 calories in under 5 MINUTES? Take a store bought pizza and put it in the over for as long as you want. Just watch the calories burn away in a puff of smoke!

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What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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Why is there a rock in a boy's foot? He wasn't weraing shoes.

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How do you make an onion cry? Onions are incapable of crying

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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RACIST JOKE Why did the racist cross the road? He wanted to get to the other side.

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What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? 'Get in the batmobile Robin'

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whats big red and eats bricks a big red brick eater

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The way I see it, there are two types of people. Some are female and some a male.

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks then comes home to his whole family murderd and mutilated

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why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

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Not gonna tell you, that was one weird story, I feel like super high right now.

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Why did the cave men discover fire? They were the only humans on earth.

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E M I L Y L Y N C H B I L L I E J E A N L A R K I N YEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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Why shouldnt you take the virginity of a 14 year old? Their pre-frontal lobe is not developed enough to sufficiently judge the affect of this action on their life.

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A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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