Why did George Bush climb the Statue of Liberty? I'm not sure, as this incident is not covered in any of the myriad books written about his administration.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Every time a bell rings an angel gets it's wings. What they don't tell you is every time a mouse trap snaps an angel gets set on fire.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, He has died, And now will you,

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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Why did the spy cross the road? To get to the other hide.

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What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

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A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

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* two sisters are making yo mama jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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the man walk in to the shop and brought a pet nothing

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the turkey was in the oven and all the farm animals thought the chicken could run the errands in his place just fine.

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Q-What happens when you grow tomatoes in Kansas on an odd number year when its an average of 398degrees Kelvin ? A-You eat em

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

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"Do you like pie?" "No." "Do you like blueberries?" "No." "I have something you won't like." "Is it a blueberry pie?" "No, I shagged your wife last night".

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dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

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Jesus on the cross promised he would return rite? So three days later he returns in ghost form and leaves. So why people still waiting for him? He returned and left already! (Lack of Moral?): The third coming: this summers blockbuster hit!

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This night was a particularly stormy one, many a crop destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could emotionally blind those who may experience it's full potential. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a secluded village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for there lives, all but Jonny, that is. Jonny was bullied from a young age, approximately 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena and his Grandfather's lucky medallion and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of HIV induced AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 3 to 5 years, depending on behavior, in a high security prison for child molestation, frequent and consistant child abuse and paedophillia and smuggling Crystal Meth. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

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A man walked into a bar. He got drunk and left.

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what do you get if you cross a retard with ruddell? andrew ruddel

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What's tall, has a really long neck, and eats leaves? My tall vegan neighbor's giraffe

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A brunette, a redhead, and a blond are all stuck on an island 100 miles away from the nearest civilization with no resources. After 2 weeks, they decide that no one is going to save them and they have to swim for it. The brunette swims 25 miles and then gets eaten by sharks. The redhead swims 75 miles and then drowns. The blond swims 99 miles but got tired, so she swam back.

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A black man, a mexican man, and a caucasian man, walk into a bar with handguns. The three break out into a gun fight and everyone is killed in the cross-fire

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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