Why did the man paint his dog blue? He has some strange mental condition and is incapable of controlling his own actions.

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What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

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What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

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why do jews have such big noses? A: it has been inherited through many generations

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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How many shots do you have to take to start feeling light-headed? Ask JFK.

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why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

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What's blue and smells like red paint? That blue guy from Megamind.

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Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

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A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

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How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A car crash.

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Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

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Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

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joe galasso from plainview ny

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q:What do you tell a deaf person? a:nothing.

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So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

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blargen fa-diddle nachen!

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Your mama's so hairy, she has to shave occasionally.

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Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

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What did the Asian man say to the Mexican man? Nothing, due to the language barrier.

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your mama so fat she has a low self esteem

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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